Matthew 11:2-11
2 When John heard in prison what the Messiah[a] was doing, he sent word by his[b] disciples 3 and said to him, “Are you the one who is to come, or are we to wait for another?” 4 Jesus answered them, “Go and tell John what you hear and see: 5 the blind receive their sight, the lame walk, the lepers[c] are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the poor have good news brought to them. 6 And blessed is anyone who takes no offense at me.”
7 As they went away, Jesus began to speak to the crowds about John: “What did you go out into the wilderness to look at? A reed shaken by the wind? 8 What then did you go out to see? Someone[d] dressed in soft robes? Look, those who wear soft robes are in royal palaces. 9 What then did you go out to see? A prophet?[e] Yes, I tell you, and more than a prophet. 10 This is the one about whom it is written,
‘See, I am sending my messenger ahead of you,
who will prepare your way before you.’
11 Truly I tell you, among those born of women no one has arisen greater than John the Baptist; yet the least in the kingdom of heaven is greater than he.
I have a love/hate relationship with ambivalence. (Mixed feelings about mixed feelings.) Can any of you relate? More likely, it’s maybe that I have a love/hate relationship with Adventing. Not with the Christmas season per se, or the spirit of giving. But I have mixed feelings about the Advent that is our lives… the Advent that we journey through as we wait for the fullness of the Kingdom’s in-breaking. There’s just so much “not yet” mixed in with all the very real “now” of Christ’s reign here on earth.
On this third week of Advent, we’re invited to wait in Joy. (That’s what the third, sometimes pink, candle of our Advent wreath stands for: JOY.) I love preaching on joy… Over the years, I’ve noticed that the New Testament lectionary passages for this week in the liturgical calendar are usually about the Angel Gabriel, delivering joyful baby announcements to both Elizabeth and to Mary- and about Mary’s song of justice & joy, singing our salvation into being. I really like preaching on singing for joy. (No mixed feelings there.) But this year’s scripture passage is a little bit of a different take on joy- one that I think resonates with our Adventing reality.
In our lives, as we listen to the daily news, we hear not so much of “Joy to the World,” but a kind of “woe to the world.” …not so much of the ways in which “Heaven and Nature Sing,” but, rather, the ways that heaven and nature groan for things to be set right.
And we wait. We wait in the mixed-up in-between of the NOW and the NOT YET.
I suppose that some people, like therapists, say that developing a capacity for ambivalence – or mixed feelings – is one of the hallmarks of maturity. It’s part of being whole. But that doesn’t mean we have to like it!! Advent, with all of its NOW and its NOT-YET, has a way of stretching us …Waiting- that makes us grow in ways that we wouldn’t otherwise choose for ourselves.
Truth be told, this week, I felt a little bit stretched in bringing you a message. Because I didn’t consult my own calendar, or notice how this week coincided with the academic calendar. I forgot to take into account that my students had a little Advent calendar of their own, counting down to the last day of the semester… Bright-eyed students, waiting in eager anticipation for their final grades to be posted, like sugar-plum fairies dancing through their smart little heads. So, I had to make that happen. I care about them; they’re high on my list of priorities.
And this semester, one of my students gave me one of the best compliments I’ve ever received as a professor. (Although there have been a few memorable compliments- like from my students in life-span development, who told me I looked “way too young” to be as OLD as I am. [Mixed Feelings.] Or from my neuroscience students, who told me they were relieved to discover that I wasn’t nearly as MEAN as I sounded on Rate My Professor (dot) com. [Although, to be honest, my pop quizzes really ARE that mean…]) We’ve generally got a pretty good rapport.
But recently, a compliment from one of my ministry students blew me away. Together, in her class, we undertook the study of pastoral care, counseling, and congregational health. In this course, there’s a lot of ground to cover. But even more important than the ground we cover is the dirt we’re invited to dig up in our own lives. The students are encouraged to assume a posture of humble self-exploration…to self-examine ways in which they are called to grow, and to review the ways that they have been stretched -sometimes painfully- by their own life experiences of wanting and of waiting. Because this is part of who they will become; part of how God is shaping them as pastors. It’s hard work. And so with tears in her eyes, one of my students came up to me, saying: “I love this class, and I hate this class.” And I knew exactly what she meant. The class prompted these pastors to submit themselves to a rigorous process of spiritual and emotional self-reflection and prayer.
After one particularly hard class period on suffering and theodicy, I sensed that the class could use a break -a chance to rest. So, I treated them to watching a movie together, called Shadowlands. It’s on the life of C.S. Lewis – about his love relationship with his wife, Joy- whom he loses. And it’s about how Joy transforms him. It’s called Shadowlands, for its interplay of light and dark: the way that love and loss both shape him, as Joy teaches Lewis that the grief he’ll feel upon losing her is actually part of the joy in their Love – that “that’s the deal.” It’s all mixed-up and in-between. Having a breakable heart makes him a whole person.
In “Mere Christianity,” probably a book that I read too fast, without letting it do its work on me, CS Lewis talks about hallways. Halls are places with doors to someplace else. Halls are places to wait. But they’re hard places to live your life. (And this reminds me of Advent.) CS Lewis writes that, while we’re in the Hallways of our lives, it’s important not to (resignedly) camp there, but to truly wait. And, in that waiting, to keep praying for glimpses of light… to learn obedience to the rules and the ways of the whole house. Lewis says that while he doesn’t understand why we should have to wait -or why some should wait longer than others – he believes that there must be good in the waiting. Perhaps it’s part of how God shapes us.
In our Scripture for today, we find John the Baptist, waiting…not in a hallway, but in a dark holding cell. And, waiting in the dark, he sends word for Jesus: “Are you the One we’re waiting for?” Jesus says to John’s disciples to go to John; “Tell what you hear and see:” Blind ones receive their sight…Deaf ones hear…The Dead are raised to life…The Poor have good news… These words were little glimpses of Joy -glimmers of the Kingdom- for John.
Like John, we also wait in the dark for glimpses of Joy. Though the Kingdom is not yet come to complete fruition, I believe (help, my unbelief) that the Kingdom is also Now- in this very place, alongside us, and within us. My prayer for you this Advent is that you are making space for Joy in this very place, within you and among us right now.
